Q&A: A Presidents Day Talk on "Mary Lincoln, Demystified"

Donna D. McCreary draws on three decades spent inhabiting the life and times of Mary Lincoln and channels these experiences into her new book, Mary Lincoln Demystified: Frequently Asked Questions About Abraham’s Wife (Southern Illinois University Press, 366 pp.). In her years devoted to Mary Lincoln, McCreary gathered questions posed to her during her portrayal of Mrs. Lincoln for audiences. A fourth-grade boy asked, “Mrs. Lincoln, what is your favorite food?” McCreary told him about Mary Lincoln’s strawberry parties, which resulted in one of the many lovely mini-essay responses in her new book and the inspiration for her 2000 book Lincoln’s Table: Victorian Recipes from Kentucky, Indiana, and Illinois to the White House, followed by Lincoln’s Table: A President’s Culinary Journey from Cabin to Cosmopolitan.Another inquiry, about Mary Lincoln’s dresses, led to Fashionable First Lady: The Victorian Wardrobe of Mary Lincoln (2007). McCreary’s insatiable curiosity, encyclopedic knowledge, lucid prose, and inventive Q&A format allow her to include the multitude of details that cannot all be included in a traditional narrative. She is also co-founder of Mary Lincoln’s Coterie: “good friends who share a common interest – that interest being Mary Lincoln, “and in that spirit, she spoke with The National about her bond with Mary Lincoln and the Todd family.

Q: Let’s begin with the cover. Inside the image of the question mark is an unfamiliar portrait of Mary Lincoln. Can you explain your choice of that rendering?

 A: I love this image of Mary Lincoln. It is a finely engraved portrait created by William Sartain of Philadelphia. He would often take a photograph of an individual, create the engraving, and destroy the photograph, leaving his artwork as the only lasting evidence of his encounter with the subject.

The dress worn in this image was featured as a fashionable carriage dress in the March 1861 issue of Peterson’s Magazine. So, this image was probably created in early 1861. The dress is simple except for the diagonal trim across the bodice, which according to the fashion plate would have extended to the hemline. A carriage dress was considered an everyday dress, not fancy or party dress. Mary’s jewelry was minimal – a pair of earrings and a ladies’ watch looped around her neck with a simple cord. She wore no headdress.

In this image Mary was portrayed in the role she most wanted to be remembered: an everyday woman. She was not the first lady, nor was she the martyred president’s widow. She was simply Mrs. Lincoln, a wife and mother. 

Q: How did you go about researching Mary Lincoln’s dresses and fashion sense in an era before photographs?       

A: A few of Mary’s clothing articles exist, and I was able to study those in person. This gave me the ability to see the fabric quality and trim details. Mary had exquisite taste in fabrics.

Since Mary was a public figure, her fashionable attire was reported in the newspapers in the same manner that modern reporters clamor on red carpets for “who wore what.” What she wore to receptions, public events, and even horseback riding was published in newspapers such as Frank Leslie’s Illustrated Newspaper, Chicago Tribune, The New York Times, New York World, and countless other American newspapers. Frequently, descriptions were filled with elaborate details that help the reader envision the gown. Some reporters only gave the basic information. Images are difficult to develop when the reporter merely states, “Mrs. Lincoln wore a blue dress.”

Another source of material is the memories of those who knew Mary. After the president’s death, friends and family members told every detail about the Lincolns’ lives. Of course, memories fade and details are often not accurate. One example is the story of Mary’s wedding dress. According to Mrs. Frances Patterson, since Mary and Abraham had little time to prepare their nuptials, Mary borrowed a white silk dress from her sister Frances Wallace (Mrs. Patterson’s grandmother) to wear during the ceremony. Since Mrs. Patterson had not yet been born at the time of the Lincoln marriage, her claim is based on family lore and a story about Mary spilling coffee on the dress during the reception. However, the recollections of those who attended the wedding, including Frances Wallace, state that Mary wore a white muslin dress at the wedding. During an interview, Mrs. Wallace explained that Mary did not wear the borrowed silk dress to the ceremony because it was too soiled.

Still, the legend continues about the silk dress because it makes a good story.

Q: In your Introduction, you candidly write that you have an “empathic and sympathetic” view of Mary Lincoln. Did that approach flow from your experience as a presenter?

A: When donning Mary’s persona, I tried to explain her life in a manner that defended her as I believe she would have done herself if given the opportunity.

However, I was sympathetic to Mary for many years prior to my performances. I began reading about Mary during my childhood. I always believed that behind every good man there is a good woman, and I just could not allow myself to believe that such a great man as Abraham Lincoln would have chosen a wicked woman as a wife.

Q: In structuring Mary Lincoln Demystified, there is a wonderful “call and response” quality to the book. You arranged questions chronologically, from childhood to death, and added a “Beyond the Grave” chapter. Why was that important?

 A: When studying history, many readers want a “birth to death” biography. This is also why I included a timeline in the appendixes. It helps to understand Mary’s position to other events. Where was she during the Chicago Fire? Well, she was in Chicago.

Chronological chapters allow the reader to see the progress of Mary’s life. Her developmental years in Lexington are vastly different from her years as a wife and mother in Springfield. Her widowhood of exile seems bleaker when compared to her previous White House social life. The topics which transcended all eras of her life were given their own chapters. The “Beyond the Grave” chapter was fun to research. Those questions were often asked after lectures or fielded through conversations. When portraying Mary, those were questions that I could not answer, for Mary would have not had knowledge of things beyond her death.

Q: You render history so well. Did you study history or absorb it by researching and portraying Mary Lincoln?

A: My love for history began as a child. Every summer, my parents took a summer vacation which included something fun and adventurous and something historical and educational. We went to Disneyland, the Roy Rogers Museum, Hoover Dam, Cowboy Hall of Fame, the Grand Canyon, Painted Desert, Petrified Forest, and several other places over one summer. Living in Indiana, trips to Abraham Lincoln’s sites such his birthplace, boyhood farm, and other places connected to the Lincoln family were weekend getaways.

It was during a trip to a wax museum in Gatlinburg, Tennessee, that I became interested in Mary Lincoln. A depiction of Lincoln’s assassination made me realize how close Mary sat to her husband on that fatal night. From that moment, I wanted to learn more about her.  

I was interested in many eras of American history and enjoyed history classes in school. I minored in history during college and taught some history when I was a teacher. I would not say I absorbed history through Mary, but that I absorbed more about Mary’s history through studying the era.

Q: You clearly examine the controversies in Mary Lincoln’s life. Why do you think some criticisms of her are so persistent? Have they intensified or waned over the years you have studied her?

A: Historians tend to blame several factors for the persistence of criticisms towards Mary. She was “a woman before her time”; she was “misunderstood”; she was “too emotional”; she was “overmedicated,” “undermedicated” – whatever the reason cited, Mary is often viewed as possessing a difficult personality. Other authors tend to believe that she deserved the criticisms that have been flung over the decades because she exhibited questionable behavior.

I do not believe that the criticism has intensified. I believe it was the worst during her lifetime. Daily stories about her were published in the newspapers. Few of the stories were favorable. As first lady, she was accused of being a Confederate spy, of stealing White House funds, of taking bribes, of mistreating staff, and of spending money on herself that could/should have been spent on soldiers. While some of these allegations continue today, many of them have been proven false.

I try to understand some of the poor behavior and explain actions from her viewpoint. I also examine her generosity and loving heart. Her frequent visits to soldiers in nearby hospitals exhibit her kindness and loving spirit. Mary, like all of us, had good and bad qualities.

Q: In your chapter “Mary, the Issue of Slavery and African Americans,” answer questions about young Mary Todd’s evolution from the daughter in a family of Kentucky slaveholders in Kentucky into a supporter of emancipation who invited African American entertainers to the White House How did you verify this history?

A: As a young child, Mary would not have realized that slavery was wrong. It was what she knew and how her household was managed. She loved the enslaved servants in her father’s home and depended on them for love, guidance, discipline, and support. There is no evidence that Mary ever thought herself as superior to the family servants. Mary was aware of others who mistreated their enslaved servants, and she found such behavior appalling. In their wills, several members of the Todd family expressed their belief in gradual emancipation and granted freedom to their enslaved servants.

As the political and social opinions about emancipation swept across the nation, Mary’s opinions would have evolved, just as Abraham’s did. As First Lady, she no longer supported gradual emancipation, but full emancipation. She welcomed African Americans to the White House and invited them to use the White House grounds for fundraisers. Mary hired African American servants in Springfield and Washington. She supported many of their charitable organizations. On this issue, Mary chose the right path.

Q: In an Appendix, you deftly detail the shoots and branches of the verdant Todd family tree. Did you use genealogy sites or other methods to track down so many names and dates with such accuracy? Do you have a favorite Todd (other than Mary)?

A: I used some genealogy sites, but mostly I depended on the family records. Fortunately, throughout the years, I have met and communicated with many members of the Todd family who have been willing to share their family papers and stories.

There are several members of the Todd family whom I found interesting. Everyone seems to love Mary’s half-sister Emilie because she was one of the first people to write about the Todd family. Her family genealogy published in the early 20th century has information dating back to when the family lived in Scotland and Ireland. I enjoyed reading the writings of Mary’s cousin Elizabeth Todd Grimsley Brown. She was close to Mary and accompanied Mary on some of those shopping adventures in New York.

Q: You also list and describe the wonderful cast of major and minor friends in Mary Lincoln’s life. Which of her friendships did you find the most surprising and interesting?

A: Knowing that James Shields had challenged Abraham Lincoln to a duel over politics, I was surprised to read that his name and Mary’s had earlier been linked together romantically. His was one more name on Mary’s “trout line” -- according to her cousin, Stephen T. Logan.

Mary’s relationship with Hannah Shearer is interesting. They were neighbors for a short time and remained friends. The two wrote chatty letters to one another until Hannah’s death in 1879.

Q: What lessons can we learn from Mary Lincoln’s life?

A: We learn to dare to be different and true to our inner self. In many ways, Mary was a typical Victorian, American housewife. She did the typical things that wives and mothers do, yet she did them on her terms. One example is the way she indulged her children.

At a time when birthday parties were not held for children, Mary held at least one party where she invited about fifty children to help her son, Willie celebrate his special day.

As First Lady, she oversaw the decorating, entertainment, and management of the White House – something that many women before her (and after) would have left to staff. Most widows quietly lived their lives surrounded by family. Mary chose to move to a different continent and travel.

Q: Last question: How has Mary Lincoln changed you?

A.   I am not sure that Mary has changed me, but I hope that I have helped

change Mary’s image. In addition to working to enhance Mary’s image through the stage plays, lectures, and books, I co-founded Mary Lincoln’s Coterie. We are a group whose purpose is to study the life of Mary Lincoln and the women in her life.

Every year, we journey to Springfield, Illinois, to pay tribute to Mary’s life and legacy. Through this organization, I have been fortunate to meet Lincoln scholars, Todd family members, and many others who share my interests.